Reply to David Still's email
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Click on the sender's name and reply to the messages


Subject: Re: Happy Birthday
Are you Dave from Encino?

If so, I'm trying to assemble YOU, ME, and the Girthman for an appearance on
my show.

I would like to do some Reservoirs Dogs type slow -mo walking stuff, where
we look cool as shit,
Hi five each other, walking with cigs hanging from our lip, then.....

A GANG of little old ladies charge us and whack us with their umbrellas, and
you hear the record come to a grinding halt, or scratch.

I think it'll be a hit.


From: "David Still" <>
> from your #1 impersonator.
> I couldn't resist the steak pic. Funny stuff!
e mark hopkins
30 Jan 2004 18:01:49
e mark hopkins
30 Jan 2004 18:01:19
Subject: Re: Happy Birthday
Thank you!

I think I'll go to one of those "eat this 8 lb steak and it's free places"


attached is a real photo of me and my dawg.

From: "David Still" <>
> from your #1 impersonator.
> I couldn't resist the steak pic. Funny stuff!
Subject: Re: A Note from King Liar & Cheater

You suck!
Go to back to Hell Lucifer

David Still <> wrote:
We are everywhere. Stop being so gullible and clueless. That's what you get for dating/marrying assholes.
e Cutie Pie
29 Jan 2004 00:01:47
28 Jan 2004 04:01:21
Subject: Re: new season
And you are still deleted loser.

He will never see your email.

Get a life.

The Webmaster

Subject: Re: Hey
I'm afraid I dont know who you are, and I didnt give out my email to
anyone at the wine gala.

David Still wrote:

>Mr. Zimon,
>How are you. Met you at the wine event this Saturday. Hope you remember, it was a good time. You told me that you work in IT at the UofC. If your still interested in that job that I told you about, please email me back. It definetly seems like it would be a good fit for you (not to mention the girls). Well, Ive got to run. So take care, and say hi to Preston for me.

James Zimon
Team Lead - IT Support Centre
Information Technologies
University of Calgary

e James Zimon
26 Jan 2004 21:01:19
e Nortynun
23 Jan 2004 22:01:42
Subject: Re: Nae luck
Subject: Re: shaw brother's memorabillia
Hi. Thanks for contacting me about this. How'd you get in touch with me anyway? Yes, I am very interested in buying this shaw brothers stuff. If you want to send me some sort of inventory list with prices that'd be great. Thanks again.

From: David Still <>

Hi Sam,

I have heard of your obsession with shaw brother's movies. My uncle recently passed away, and left me a complete collection of shaw brothers stuff. Included in this collection are his complete set of movies including several very rare movies. I also have a bunch of autographed photos, movie props, and original posters. This collection is so large that I have no space for it in my small apartment. I would be willing to sell it for a very low price if you are interested. If so, please email me back.

Thank you,
David Still
e Sam Adelman
23 Jan 2004 04:01:18
e Sarah Portney
22 Jan 2004 15:01:28
Subject: RE: Hello
Im sorry, I don't think I know you, My name is Sarah Portney, are you sure you have the right email address?

-----Original Message-----
From: David Still []
Sent: Thursday, January 22, 2004 9:32 AM
To: Sarah Portney
Subject: Hello

Hey there...It's been a long time. I hope everything is well and looking forward to seeing you soon. Please say hello to Jimmy.
Subject: FW: Gossip
I receive lots of spam each day, and I dispose of it without reading it. Gossip would often fall in this category. If there is something I need to know, you may send it to me again.

Jennifer Wilson-Harvey
Vice Chairman, Executive Committee
Wilson & Associates, P.L.L.C.
11501 Huron Lane
Little Rock, AR 72211
501-223-0949 - Office
501-223-0944 - Fax
E-Mail: <>

To escalate a complaint please email: <>

To compliment a job well done please email: <>

This transmission may be: (1) subject to the Attorney-Client Privilege, (2)
an attorney work product, or (3) strictly confidential. If you are not the
intended recipient of this message, you may not disclose, print, copy or
disseminate this information. If you have received this in error, please
reply and notify the sender (only) and delete the message. Unauthorized
interception of this e-mail is a violation of federal criminal law.

-----Original Message-----
From: Mary Jane Caratachea
Sent: Tuesday, January 20, 2004 9:35 AM
To: Jennifer Wilson
Subject: FW: Gossip

-----Original Message-----
From: David Still []
Sent: Tuesday, January 20, 2004 9:20 AM
To: Mary Jane Caratachea
Subject: Gossip

We sent a friendly email to Jennifer Wilson, concerning the terrible gossip that certain employees have been spreading. She obviously didn't find it necessary to do anything about it. We do not think it is anyone's business that Robby knocked up his young assistant. But keeping around this particular person spreading the gossip is not good business practice. Mr. Weathernton needs to mind his own business and do his job.
The Fab Five

e Jennifer Wilson
20 Jan 2004 16:01:11
e Daoud Kuttab
20 Jan 2004 13:01:45
Subject: The annual Daoud Kuttab family newsletter
dear family and friends,

Now that you have read all the incoming Christmas cards and New Year's greetings, you will have a little time to read our annual family newsletter which you can read (and see many nice photos) by clicking on feel free to pass the url address to any of our mutual friends.For those getting duplicates please ignore.

Daoud, Salam, Tamara, Bishara, Tania and Dina KUTTAB
Subject: PC Bug Doctor
Okay, let's do this right. I see your point. It is a distinct posibility. I feel pretty incoherent today; sorry if this is confusing.

Look: There are worse things that could happen.
I telepathically channel the unknown.

I don't know the answer to your question. Does the universe remember? Probably. We all have to make some kind of plans for ourselves. It will have to reverse itself eventually.

Then again: This is the result: I am not the wavy carpet. I am the happy kind. Then again:

Are you making up for something? Probably. But it can't go on forever.

The limit of this function tends to zero. Don't worry about it. I live in a cosmos of chaos and sadness. And at some point, as they say, the map comes to resemble the territory.

I remembered you all they way from high school. Your signal/noise ratio is degrading.

Look, there's something else that's been on my mind. I don't want to be predictable. I am not the wavy carpet. I am the happy kind. I live in a cosmos of chaos and sadness.

That's fine, though. Bear with me for a moment.Can't we just be friends? Maybe this will help us all in the long run. You were pretty back in the old days. This isn't really sustainable, but it's better than the alternative.

And that's really the end of that. Like they say:I can't help you there. Okay, let's do this right.
e Allied Marketing Promotions, LLC
20 Jan 2004 13:01:28
e Allied Marketing Promotions, LLC
20 Jan 2004 06:01:31
Subject: Get a $25 gift card to these great restaurants
I'll be waiting patiently for your reply. I see your point. This will end well. It's all just a big joke.

Don't worry about it. I remembered you all they way from high school.
Don't worry about it.

It's scary, I have to admit. It's always in question. There is no way to escape entropy. I was going to wait a while before we talked about this.

I'll be waiting patiently for your reply. This is all a desperate plea for help. This is the result: Tell me what you think about this.

You know what I mean?I am a lepton.

I was going to wait a while before we talked about this. The trend here is obvious: I can't help you there. There is no way to escape entropy.

Look, there's something else that's been on my mind. It's all just so much white noise; nothing more than that.

The trend here is obvious: And at some point, as they say, the map comes to resemble the territory. You were pretty back in the old days. I can't help you there.

I'd rather go outside and play. Our perception of the feminine seems to have changed.I skipped the whole school thing. I am a boson. Help me ! I'm trapped in an e-mail factory! Look, there's something else that's been on my mind.

This is the end result of a life lived with consequences. I'm not sure that I have anything more to say about this. Like they say: I'll be waiting patiently for your reply.
Subject: RE: you may not...
Thanks bitch

-----Original Message-----
From: David Still
Subject: you may not...

lick my insoles

The information transmitted in this email is intended only for the person(s) or entity to which it is addressed and may contain confidential and/or privileged material. Any review, retransmission, dissemination or other use of, or taking of any action in reliance upon, this information by persons or entities other than the intended recipient is prohibited. If you received this email in error, please contact the sender and permanently delete the email from any computer.

e John Ferber
19 Jan 2004 22:01:34
9 Jan 2004 18:01:00
Subject: Re: listen, buddy
Faggot, I work at Trader Joe's. Get a life.


> From: David Still <>
> You have not been in Trader Joe's for some time now... I miss you.
Esp.miss your sister and her tongue.
9 Jan 2004 05:01:33
5 Jan 2004 20:01:41
Subject: Re: listen, buddy
Dear Ghost Writer,
Give "David Still" this message; David is dumb.



p.s. The thing about my sister is getting old. Please get some new

> [Original Message]
> From: David Still <>
> Twist! read this: ..."is eating away at me one grammatical error at a
time." Now that is a run-on sentence. What you need is a comma after "me"
to make the rest of the dependent clause into an adverbial modifier. But
let us forget the grammar and talk about my licking your sister's
pussy...can you have her get in touch with me I have cam and we could us IM
for me to see her twat and for her to seem mu cock. Advise.
4 Jan 2004 18:01:24
4 Jan 2004 00:01:47
Subject: RE: listen, buddy
Read what you have written me. You are a pathetic being. Please!! Your lack
of education is eating away at me one grammatical error at a time.

Subject: Re: listen, buddy
Is your sister a mouse? I don't get it. And how can I check your sister or
mother? And what am I checking them for? And if you came to California, how
could you fuck my sister? My sister doesn't live here. My sister is in Iraq
fighting for your country.

You suck at clues. You suck at analogies or metaphors or whatever that
thing about a mouse was.

You are dumb.


> From: David Still <>
> you can fuck a mouse, but that does not make you a super hero. just check
my sister or mother and they will tell you that i will come over to
california and am capable of fucking your sister.
> (that was a clue)
1 Jan 2004 23:01:12
31 Dec 2003 22:12:31
Subject: Re: listen, buddy
So it's like this; My sister is in Iraq fighting for our country, I don't
have a spouse and my mom is happily married in Northern California. You
can't fuck any of them, I'm sorry.

I think you should quit wasting your time on the computer and go back to
school. Take some English courses or something. It's just sad. I mean, how
do you expect to make a living wage when you grow up and move out of
mommy's house?

Anyway, keep in mind paly-aly that you had better remain absolutely
anonymous with me because if I knew who you were, I might be inclined to
beat your ass to a fucking pulp. That is if I knew who you were. But I


> [Original Message]
> From: David Still <>
> deat twister--stop being so fresh and get your slut sister to write
me!!!I don't need your shit. I need your sister's hot pussy! or your
wife's. Or your mom's...after a time I will write to you to teach you
manners. In the meantime, get sis on so I can get off with her.

> wrote:
> Where's MY DAVID STILL?!!!
> Who wrote that email? It's funny, I know your personality now. YOU DID
> NOT WRITE THAT, idiot.
> Who's your ghost-writer? Did you have your mommy do your homework for
> Jack-ass.
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